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Roald Kvam 2023 If we tell our children, spouses, or employees that they are stupid or bad at a certain thing, have no gift for it, and are doing it all wrong, we strip them of any motivation to improve. If instead, we use the opposite technique and openly encourage them as they take steps…
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Roald Kvam 2023 Giving the other person a lofty reputation to live up to incites in them a desire to meet those expectations. — — —«If you want to improve a person in a certain aspect, act as though that particular trait were already one of his or her outstanding characteristics.» (Dale Carnegie)— — —…
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Roald Kvam 2023 Take a brief look back on your own life to this point. Can you think of a time when a few words of praise have had a hand in shaping the person you’ve become? One of the most powerful abilities we have is helping others realize their potential. We can do this…
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Roald Kvam 2023 When we disagree with someone, even if we are right and he is definitely wrong, we only destroy his ego by causing him to lose face. — — —«I have no right to say or do anything that diminishes a man in his own eyes. What matters is not what I think…
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Roald Kvam 2023 No one likes to take orders. What if, instead of telling people what to do, we gave them the opportunity to do things themselves, to learn from their own mistakes? Instead of saying “Do this” or “Don’t do that,” we should more often say, “You might consider this,” or “Do you think…
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Roald Kvam 2023 This one I like a lot: If we seek to challenge people’s ways without inflicting negative feelings we should be the 1st one to admit that we are also susceptible to mistakes. It is much easier to listen to a description of our own faults when the person criticizing begins by humbly…
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Roald Kvam 2023 Most of us respond bitterly to direct criticism. So… let’s not! When we’re looking to change people without offending them or arousing resentment, simply changing one three-letter word can be our key to success. Really? Yes! Many people begin their criticism with sincere praise followed by the word “BUT” and their critical…
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Roald Kvam 2023 It’s much easier to listen to unpleasant things after we’ve been praised for our good points. That’s why the first step to changing people without offending them is to begin with appreciation for their strengths. For example, if a colleague writes a speech for a conference that we feel is too lengthy…
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Roald Kvam 2023 Most people have an innate desire to achieve. Along with that desire often comes a fierce sense of competition – everyone wants to outdo others and be the best. When nothing else works in winning people to your way of thinking, throw down a challenge. — — —«The way to get things…
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Roald Kvam 2023 People usually have two reasons for doing things. One that sounds good. And the real one… A person will recognize on his own the real reason he does something. We don’t need to point it out. But all of us, being idealists at heart, like to think of motives that sound good.…
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