DREIESKIVA​|Roald Kvam

Roald Kvam 2023

Giving the other person a lofty reputation to live up to incites in them a desire to meet those expectations.

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«If you want to improve a person in a certain aspect, act as though that particular trait were already one of his or her outstanding characteristics.» (Dale Carnegie)
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Carnegie offers an example of a mechanic named Bill whose work had become unsatisfactory. Instead of berating or threatening Bill, his manager simply called Bill into his office and told him:
“You are a fine mechanic, you have been in the business for many years, and we’ve had a number of compliments on the good work you have done. But lately, your work has not been up to your own old standards, and I thought you’d want to know since you’ve been such an outstanding mechanic in the past.”

The result?

Bill once again became a fast and thorough mechanic. With the reputation his manager had given him to live up to, how could he not?

Let’s NIKE it: Just Do It!

When you’re trying to change someone’s mind, give them a reputation to live up to by saying something like:

“I respect the fact that you’re always willing to listen and are big enough to change your mind when the facts warrant a change.”

In short:

Raise the bar! Appeal to their nobler motives of responsibility, fairness, openness, diligence, etc. And let the other person decide whether they will live up to those motives or not.

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Source & Inspiration: «How to Win Friends & Influence People» (Dale Carnegie, Andrew MacMillan, et al.)