For those moments when everything shifts—and you need to find your footing again
It can happen suddenly. A phone call, a diagnosis, a resignation, a loss—something changes, and nothing is as it was. Whether it’s a personal crisis, a health challenge, a leadership exit, or a major organizational shake-up, you find yourself in a new landscape you didn’t choose—and weren’t prepared for.
This article is for those first days or weeks. When the ground has shifted. When your mind is racing, your body is on high alert, and it’s hard to see a way forward. Here, we’ll walk through how to understand what’s happening—and how to begin, gently, to move again.
1. When everything stops: The initial shock
Major life events activate your whole system. Anxiety, numbness, brain fog, sleeplessness, or even tears that come out of nowhere—these are all normal. You may feel like you’re functioning on autopilot.
This is not weakness. It’s being human.
Your mind is trying to make sense of something too large to grasp all at once.
Give yourself permission to respond as you need to.
You don’t have to know the plan yet. There is no rush.
2. Be gentle with yourself in the emergency phase
In the beginning, it’s not about solving anything. It’s about getting through—physically, emotionally, mentally.
Here are a few anchors that help:
- Eat and rest, even if you don’t feel like it. Your system needs fuel.
- Talk to someone. You don’t need to explain everything—just let some air in.
- Create micro-routines. Get up at the same time. Take a short walk. Drink water. Breathe.
- Allow pauses. You don’t need to be strong every moment.
- Let go of performance. You’re not here to impress. You’re here to heal—or at least stabilize.
3. The invisible shift: When you realize the old is gone
Eventually, a quiet realization comes.
This is real. This isn’t temporary. The old life is gone.
This is painful—but also pivotal. It marks the beginning of true transition. Not a quick fix, but a slow crossing into new territory, where you begin to grasp:
“The life I knew no longer exists. But I still do. And I can still live.”
That moment is sacred. Not because it’s easy, but because it holds the seed of what’s next.
4. How do you begin again?
Not with bold declarations or 5-year plans.
You start with the smallest step.
- Ask yourself: What do I need today?
- Choose one thing. What is one small step I can take?
- Write it down. Language grounds intention.
Maybe it’s texting a friend. Making coffee and playing a song you love. Taking five deep breaths with your hand on your heart.
These are not trivial—they are foundation stones for your restart.
5. Don’t walk the transition alone
Major transitions are lighter when they’re shared.
- Ask for help. This is not weakness—it’s wise leadership.
- Talk to someone skilled. A coach, therapist, or mentor can help hold the weight.
- Find your restart circle. Who grounds you? Who can sit with your silence?
- Be on your own team. This doesn’t mean you always feel hopeful—it means you show up for yourself, again and again.
Even excellent leaders need community to heal well.
6. Life won’t be the same—But it can become something new
Accepting change doesn’t mean loving it.
It means making space for new meaning, new joy, new direction—even if it looks different than before.
You will grieve.
And you will grow.
And in time, you may find strength you never knew you had.
Restarting isn’t going back.
It’s growing forward.
Not because you have to—but because you can.
A final note for this moment
If you’re standing in the rubble right now—
You don’t need all the answers.
You don’t need to see the whole path.
It’s enough to be standing.
Or sitting.
Or breathing.
That is enough for today.
And when you’re ready—take one small step.
Toward yourself.
Toward a future that’s still worth building.
Would you like tailored support for your restart—professionally or personally?
I help leaders design growth journeys rooted in clarity, care, and resilience. Let’s start the conversation—no pressure, just a safe space to explore.
DREIESKIVA|Roald Kvam 
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