DREIESKIVA​|Roald Kvam

I came across a song where the refreng and a verse glued itself to my soul.

This song was «A lot More free» by Max McNown. He sings like this, the refreng first:

I’m a little bit hurt but a lot more free
I ain’t sayin that you never took a toll on me
For what it’s worth, I can finally see
That I’m a little bit hurt but a lot more free
Yeah, I’m a little bit hurt but a lot more free

From this mountain, I can see so far
Rivers running like deep, deep scars
Carrying the lifeblood through my veins
Is it crazy that I’m grateful for all the pain?

Life often presents us with difficult choices. Sometimes, in order to grow or move forward, we must let go of things, people, or situations that have held us back. The process of letting go is rarely without pain – whether it’s the ending of a relationship, stepping away from a familiar environment, or leaving behind a part of ourselves. In these moments, it’s natural to feel hurt, confused, or even heartbroken. However, there’s often a deeper truth that emerges: as we shed these attachments, we become a little bit hurt, but a lot more free.

Freedom, in this context, is not merely the absence of chains or restrictions. It’s a deeper, internal freedom – the kind that comes from reclaiming your autonomy, realigning with your true self, and choosing to move in a direction that supports your growth and happiness. This journey from pain to freedom is transformative, and though the hurt may linger for a while, the newfound sense of liberation is often worth it.

The pain of letting go

The initial hurt that accompanies change can be intense. Whether it’s a relationship that no longer serves us, a job that stifles our potential, or a dream that didn’t materialize the way we imagined, walking away is rarely easy. We become attached to the familiar, even if it is uncomfortable or damaging.

There is a comfort in the known, and leaving it behind can feel like losing a part of ourselves.

This pain is natural and valid. Letting go often requires mourning what could have been, and the visions of the future that were tied to our previous circumstances. We may question our decisions, doubt our strength, or feel overwhelmed by the emotional weight of the change.

Feelings of hurt are a reflection of the emotional investment we’ve made in the things we are leaving behind, and it’s important to honor that.

However, while the pain of loss is real, it is also temporary. The discomfort that comes with letting go is often the price we pay for the freedom we are about to embrace. It is a necessary step in the process of releasing ourselves from the things that no longer align with who we are becoming.

Gaining freedom through release

Once the initial wave of hurt subsides, something remarkable begins to happen. The space that was once filled with frustration, unhappiness, or even bitterness begins to clear, and we find ourselves with the freedom to create something new. This newfound freedom comes in many forms.

The freedom of self-expression

When we are no longer confined by the expectations or limitations of a situation or relationship, we can begin to express who we truly are. Whether it’s pursuing passions we had neglected, discovering new interests, or simply being more authentic in our daily lives, freedom brings with it the opportunity to align our actions with our values and desires.

The freedom of choice

Often, we don’t realize how limited our choices have become when we are deeply entrenched in a situation. We adapt, we compromise, and eventually, we may feel that we have no other options.

Once we let go, we realize that we are free to make new choices.

This might mean choosing a new career path, exploring different relationships, or even deciding to take better care of our own well-being. The possibilities open up when we allow ourselves to step away from what was holding us back.

The Freedom of Personal Growth

Letting go allows us to evolve. We grow when we step out of our comfort zones, face our fears, and embrace the unknown. The lessons we learn from painful experiences often lead to profound self-awareness and emotional resilience.

By enduring a little bit of hurt, we gain the freedom to transform into a stronger, more self-assured version of ourselves.

Navigating the transition

The journey from being hurt to feeling free is not always linear… There will be moments where doubt creeps in, and times when the hurt feels stronger than the freedom. It’s essential to remind ourselves during these periods that growth is often accompanied by discomfort.

Just as a butterfly must struggle to break free from its cocoon, we too must endure moments of pain in order to fully embrace our freedom.

It’s helpful to surround ourselves with support during this time. Whether it’s friends, family, or mentors, having people who believe in us and encourage our journey can make all the difference. They can remind us of the bigger picture when we feel overwhelmed by the smaller, painful moments.

Additionally, practicing self-compassion is crucial. Acknowledging our emotions, allowing ourselves to grieve what was lost, and being patient with ourselves as we navigate this new chapter are key to moving forward with grace.

Freedom is not about dismissing our pain, but about accepting it as part of the process and trusting that we are moving toward something better.

A new perspective

Ultimately, being «a little bit hurt but a lot more free» is a testament to our resilience and capacity for transformation.

The pain we experience is a sign that we cared deeply, that we were invested in the things we let go of. But the freedom we gain is a reflection of our courage – our willingness to prioritize our own well-being and happiness over comfort and familiarity.

In the end, the hurt will fade, but the freedom we earn will remain. It will become the foundation upon which we build the next chapter of our lives, filled with new opportunities, deeper connections, and a stronger sense of self. And when we look back, we will see that the pain was but the price to pay.